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It’s always so embarrassing when you are having a conversation in your head and you realize you are making faces that go along with the silent conversation

When I meet someone I don’t like, I automatically take their name off of the list of names I could possibly give to my future children.

I wonder if the word “classy” is ever used non-sarcastically.

“I’ll fucking kill you!”. No, you won’t. At most, you may throw a wild girl punch, but I think we both know that murder is off the table.' />

15 Points Of Interests That Should Be Ruminated Upon

Инглиш лессон, как обычно!
15 Points Of Interests That Should Be Ruminated Upon

It’s always so embarrassing when you are having a conversation in your head and you realize you are making faces that go along with the silent conversation

When I meet someone I don’t like, I automatically take their name off of the list of names I could possibly give to my future children.

I wonder if the word “classy” is ever used non-sarcastically.

“I’ll fucking kill you!”. No, you won’t. At most, you may throw a wild girl punch, but I think we both know that murder is off the table.

I want to follow a random family around Disneyland for a day and just be in the background of all of their photos.

I tend to think love would be a lot more efficient if Cupid replaced his bow and arrow with a sniper rifle. We need some accuracy up in this bitch.

The amount of paper towel I use to squash and discard a bug is directly related to whether or not I know what kind of bug it is.

Dear ice cubes, please stop attacking my face. I just want the rest of my drink.

There are 2 guys in here with ponytails. I believe that exceeds the acceptable number of guys with ponytails by 2.

I have a hard time believing there was a time in my life that I had to be coaxed to finish my entire plate of food.

Some lady tried to sell her baby at a Taco Bell for $500. Who the hell has that type of money at a Taco Bell? You can eat like royalty for $3.87 there. Know your market lady, sheesh.

It has never stopped surprising me how exhausting it is to do nothing all day.

There comes a time in everyone’s life when you decide on a hairstyle and commit to it until you die.

It’s all fun and games until someone steps on a Lego.

I wish women came equipped with progress bars so I could see how close I am to scoring.
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